1: A Perfect Gift for Mother's Day, Which Is Every Day!
"The thought "mother" cannot be separated from that of "love." Love is sweet, tender, and delicious. Without love, a child cannot flower, an adult cannot mature. Without love, we weaken, wither." --Thich Nhat Hanh
By some cosmic coincidence, a copy of this sweet little booklet happened to land in my mail box right on my son's 40th birthday, a day when the vast topic of birth and motherhood was very much on my mind. Since the sender had no idea it was my son's birth date, I took it as a divinely inspired message of appreciation from the Universe!
A Rose for Your Pocket is a short, beautifully composed essay on motherhood by Vietnamese Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh. The title is inspired by a Japanese custom on Mother's Day. If your mother is still alive, you wear a red flower on your pocket or your lapel, proud that you still have your mother. If she is no longer alive, you wear a white flower.
The sparkling Introduction to this booklet is by Betsy Rose, a mother who first met Thich Nhat Hanh at a retreat in Ojai, California, where I happen to live. Mothers everywhere will identify with her honest observations about her spiritual practice after her son was born. She writes:
"My practice was still very new and I was eager to be a perfect spiritual mother to my long-awaited child. Surely the equanimity, patience, and understanding that I developed on the meditation cushion would enable me to create the family of my dreams.
This confidence quickly disappeared. At eighteen months, Matt looked at me coolly, picked up my favorite teacup and smashed it on the sidewalk...I have to say honestly that Thich Nhat Hanh's teachings did not make me the parent of a model Buddha-baby, nor was I constantly imbued with wise speech, equanimity, and mindfulness...Yet the loving and gentle wisdom contained in these pages, and in Thich Nhat Hanh's many other writings, have offered me something even better: acceptance of my, and my child's, humanity, compassion for both our suffering, and a new way of seeing the inevitable disappointments, seeming failures, and sense of inadequacy that is our common lot as parents."
I smiled with recognition as I saw myself in these words!
The Introduction is followed by five chapters, consisting of 45 mini pages. Using Buddhist teachings, recollections of his own mother, and rituals from around the world, Thich Nhat Hanh describes our deep interconnectedness with our mothers. Using personal stories of love, struggle, and reconciliation, these writings celebrate the qualities embodied by motherhood.
I consider it a good sign that the first edition of A Rose for Your Pocket sold over 2 million copies around the world and has been translated into several languages; this second edition has three new chapters with meditation practices and ceremonies for reconciliation.
This loving tribute to motherhood fits nicely inside an envelope with a Mother's Day card. Busy mothers can tuck the booklet in a pocket or purse, and turn to it whenever they feel unappreciated! A thoughtful gift for Mother's Day -- and that means any day, for every day should be Mother's Day!
-- Suza Francina, mother, author, yoga teacher. [...]
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