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Title: The Primal Wound: Understanding the Adopted Child
ISBN: 0963648004
Author:
Nancy Verrier
Publicate Date: 1993-04
Publish: 1993-04
List Price: $15.00
Average Customer Rating: 4.0
Format: Paperback
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Amazon Lowest New Price: $9.00
Amazon Lowest Used Price: $5.91
Amazon Merchant Price: $10.20
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| Customer Review: |
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1: Reads like a 9th grade "research" paper
If there is some legitimacy to the theory that adoptees experience a primal wound when separated from their birth mothers, you won't find it in this book. It seemed like an amateur attempt at a thesis paper wherein the author chose a hypothesis and then proceeded to pull supporting "evidence" out of thin air (i.e. her personal experience, biased observation, selected anecdotes). Her conclusions were unsupported yet absolute. By the end, I was reading passages aloud to my husband (an adoptee) and we laughed at the absurdity of it. What is not funny, however, is the influence this piece of garbage will have on less critical readers who will accept the author's conclusions as legitimate in some way. I have to ask--was this endeavor the author's attempt to justify her own failings as an adoptive parent?
P.S. The author lost ALL credibility when she discussed the natural sexual feelings that adopted children and their birth parents might feel for one another upon reuniting. WHAT?!??!! At least she didn't bother with any pretense of substantiation on that one. She just made it up, like most of the rest of this book.
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2: eye opener
This book changed the way I look at my adopted child- especially her errattic push and pull behaviors. I have bought it for her therapists. She started verbally asking me for her 'mommy' at 3 years old (she came to me at about 5 weeks old). I recieved no training or information from the adoption agency about her reliquishment or any issues that might follow. The Primal Wound may have started us on the correct path to save my child from the pain in her own soul.
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3: Primal Wound
This is an extremely valuable read for anyone trying to assist a struggling adoptee. My child is now in a therapeutic boarding school--a very painful choice. This book shed light on the likely root causes of so much of her pain.
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4: Joy an Adult Adoptee
ANYONE HAVING SOMETHING TO DO WITH THE ADOPTION OR THE PSYCHIATRIC PROCESS SHOULD READ THIS BOOK! The importance and strength of the human,especially maternal, bond in humans is made clear.
There is a lot of preventative help for adopted families and birth parents, as well as healing and understanding for those who grew up in a time that understood even less of the needs of a newborn. Most explanations also apply to any kind of abandonment issue, even if temporary. I found explanations for behaviors that just baffles all reason. The good news is that there is help to reverse such behaviors.
Joy
p.s.Even many puppies and kittens who are not properly weened before they're seperated from their mother, experience problems or strange behaviors. Why can't we acknowledge how much more important and powerful this issue is in human society? It's just common sense that we want to ignore, because we think we can, and everything will be fine. Such as I have done most of my life, much to my detriment.
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5: Don't Waste Your Time ...
On and on and on.... about adoption and separation from the birth mother, etc., etc.
Was left feeling like adoption is HOPELESS...
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